The Construction Chronicles, Part 1
(Inspired by Captain Wow's metaphoric housekeeping)
I'm waiting for the Amazing Grace Elephant Company (yes, that's really the name of the company) to come and pick up my trim for dip-stripping. It's been sitting in my foyer since October 9th. It'll take some adjusting after it's gone - it almost became a coat rack.
It's really my house and its chronic state of incompletion that is at the root of my introspection as of late. Well, not all of my introspection. Part of that is just me.
I bought this house two years ago. I've been able to do a lot to improve its appearance on the first floor. Paint is a miracle! The second floor was another issue. Outdated is too kind; grim is a better word. My family is helping me convert the unfinished attic into an apartment. There's been a lot of work in the last year and a half on the second and third floors, and progress has been made. But I still have drywall dust on my furniture and chunks of insulation on my floor, tools lining my hallway and paint cans in my bedroom.
I'm getting tired of this environment. I'm beginning to lose my vision. I'm having difficulty keeping in mind why I'm doing any of this.
Let me out!!!!!!!!!
But now that I have the place all torn up, I'm past the point of no return. I can't stop. I can't sell it; no one would buy it in this shape. And, I can't leave it as it is because I can't stand it in this shape. And, I'm tired, inside and out.
Metaphors abound...
Did you ever find yourself on a road that began in a good place, with a good plan and a worthy goal, only to find on the way that you were pressed in on every side and alone? Like you couldn't remember why you started on this road in the first place, and what you were striving for? And, that as tired and lonely as you were, you couldn't turn back? Did you hang on? Did you give up?
Have you ever been a friend to someone whose life was in chaos? Someone who had forgotten why they were striving for the prize they treasured in the beginning? Someone about to give up? Did you hang on to them? Did you give up?
At the risk of coming down hard on myself, I'm asking myself right now, tonight, if I can't have patience for this house and its metamorphosis, how can I have patience for people, and for myself?
What if I look at my house project as a crude training ground for loving you better?
I'm waiting for the Amazing Grace Elephant Company (yes, that's really the name of the company) to come and pick up my trim for dip-stripping. It's been sitting in my foyer since October 9th. It'll take some adjusting after it's gone - it almost became a coat rack.
It's really my house and its chronic state of incompletion that is at the root of my introspection as of late. Well, not all of my introspection. Part of that is just me.
I bought this house two years ago. I've been able to do a lot to improve its appearance on the first floor. Paint is a miracle! The second floor was another issue. Outdated is too kind; grim is a better word. My family is helping me convert the unfinished attic into an apartment. There's been a lot of work in the last year and a half on the second and third floors, and progress has been made. But I still have drywall dust on my furniture and chunks of insulation on my floor, tools lining my hallway and paint cans in my bedroom.
I'm getting tired of this environment. I'm beginning to lose my vision. I'm having difficulty keeping in mind why I'm doing any of this.
Let me out!!!!!!!!!
But now that I have the place all torn up, I'm past the point of no return. I can't stop. I can't sell it; no one would buy it in this shape. And, I can't leave it as it is because I can't stand it in this shape. And, I'm tired, inside and out.
Metaphors abound...
Did you ever find yourself on a road that began in a good place, with a good plan and a worthy goal, only to find on the way that you were pressed in on every side and alone? Like you couldn't remember why you started on this road in the first place, and what you were striving for? And, that as tired and lonely as you were, you couldn't turn back? Did you hang on? Did you give up?
Have you ever been a friend to someone whose life was in chaos? Someone who had forgotten why they were striving for the prize they treasured in the beginning? Someone about to give up? Did you hang on to them? Did you give up?
At the risk of coming down hard on myself, I'm asking myself right now, tonight, if I can't have patience for this house and its metamorphosis, how can I have patience for people, and for myself?
What if I look at my house project as a crude training ground for loving you better?
3 Comments:
The attic, the spiritual side of our house. Yes, we need to build and to have it in order. Keep working. That's all we can ever do.
I'm reading...and catching up.
My first thought...
"If you build it they will come..."
Yes! And they won't even wait until you're finished! ;)
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